You're doing fine. I think what you need to do regarding watching the dogs in the house while he is in Iraq is use four words:
"I'm sorry, I can't."
He is not pursuing you now; he is running to the Middle East. So you need to run west (figuritively). That means you do not commit anything to him. And that includes moving into your marital home to watch his house for him.
I would also suggest not making plans to move back to his town because he is just taking for granted that you'll eventually be back and he'll eventually see you again.
I believe there needs to be created a feeling of potential loss that he may never see you again.
Tell him you thought about the dog and house offer and that you are "Sorry, I can't." and that you actually decided you are going to stay in the town you are in and not move back there after all.
