he's going to take my child away

[NikB]

(((Mary)))

I'm so sorry. What an a$$ your H is being right now.

PLEASE do not let him blackmail you with the whole AD thing. There are thousands and thousands of good parents on ADs - I don't even know the stats on AD sales but I know there are a lot.

I've been worried for awhile he was trying to build a "mental health" case against you. If I remember right from the brief online search I did, that was the only thing he could probably use as grounds for HIM to file. When I saw that I got worried, but hoped he would not go down that path. Can you ask your L more about this? Your L's info would be far more reliable than my attempt to interpret something off the internet that may or may not be accurate, but this is why I was so worried about that incident when you confronted him at his place - afraid he'd try to use it against you.

I think your VERY best course of action right now is to remain calm, cool, collected, and confident that you are a wonderful Mom to your D.

And, are you documenting everything and making sure your lawyer has a clear picture of each thing he's done? In particular:

- Sending her out of state
- Making her miss school (if she did)
- Making her miss her counseling appointment on Monday
- Taking your keys (and later your car)
- Locking the thermostat so you couldn't adjust it
- Blackmailing you with the 401K money (I know this one is not specifically about your D, but when this didn't work I suspect he decided to use your D against you).

... I'm sure there's more.

If anything, at this point, I think you're looking like the only sane parent. Granted we're only hearing the story from your side, but the stuff your H has done is really over the top. I think the fact that you are TREATING and taking care of your depression is going to speak volumes to the judge - FAR more than your H, who frankly is acting mentally ill and NOT getting treated.

Please make sure you are passing EVERYTHING on to your lawyer and that your lawyer is bringing it up to the judge. Are there other red flags that you're remembering now? Pass those on, too.

((((Mary))))

I honestly think that you're likely to not only get at least 50/50 custody of your D, I think you're in a good position to end up with PRIMARY custody if your H keeps this crap up.