Onward and upward

[mishka422]

you guys are the best!

Thanks for your words of encouragement. I was really feeling down about having to bring up the visitation issue. It hurts me but I can handle that. It was the look on my son's face when he got the text from his dad and his eyes lit up that did me in. Later, when I asked him how he was doing and he told me that it bothered him a little to know that his dad was off work and not spending the time with him that I really went to "the dark side". I couldn't keep my mouth shut anymore. I didn't get ugly with my H, I just told it like it was in a nice tone of voice.

My H was in the first invasion (1991-1992). He's been back SO long and things were not as rough that time around as they are now. Still, he did see some very dark things and did eventually open up to me some about it. I guess these things don't ever really go away do they?

Interesting about the C. He actually was forced into admin leave by the department about a month ago and forced to see the state Psych for the certification board. They insisted also that he get back on his meds and get clearance signed off by psychiatrist before he could come back to work. The psych put him back on ADD meds and an AD. I asked him about it the other day when I saw him and he said that the ADD meds are helping him quite a bit. He's much calmer (which I could tell also). He said he hasn't been taking the AD's because he read the side effects and didn't like the idea of those. I told him the side effects go away usually after time and it takes at least 30 days for the AD to get in your system and work. He just said hmmmmm. Ok, when he tells psych he hasn't been taking the AD's he prescribed him how is that going to affect his job? I don't know but it can't be good. They drug test him all the time and they are now going to be looking for both drugs in his system because they excpect them to be there. When both aren't, he's going to have a problem.

I'm reading a book I just got titled "When a Mate Wants Out" by Jim and Sally Conway. It's Christian based book with a lot of the same ideas from Michele's book with prayer and pastoral support thrown in. I must say that my church family has been an enormous help in this. I had never been very involved in my congregation, just attended on Sunday and the odd seminar and such, but now they have embraced me with such support. It's really awesome!