He left then Cheated ---Now What???

[kat727]

I just wanted to say Thanks for coming by my thread and offering such kind words. I'll try to catch up on yours and keep an eye on you.
kat

[LL44]

Hi.

If you have it in you to hang on and give H some room, I can seriously see him coming back. I think he forgot to mention he is terrified that your changes won't 'stick' and that you guys will end up back in a rough patch 2 years down the road. But, its great that he sees them, that his anger has calmed, and that he really wants to work on himself before he makes any decisions.

If you are in somewhat of a good place yourself, I would give it some time and see what happens. Take care.

[No Longer BH]

Thank you LWB, you have brought tears to my eyes because I want to hope so badly. I know he is terrified that they will go back to the way they were, he has said so. I want to give him all of the space in the world so that he can heal and get his head on straight. It's the OW that makes me so terrified. I think his "working on himself" is code for "lets see how it goes with OW". <Sigh> I can only focus on my happiness so that no matter what I am in a better place, with or without him. Still , I would prefer it to be with him.

[runningoutoftime]

I would have probably wrote a short quick "Thanks for the message. I appreciate the kind words. You take care, BH"

It's just a nice reply without any demands. And then, after that, go be busy with your life. Enjoy the hot bod you now have and show it off! GAL GAL GAL!!!!!

[runningoutoftime]

I would have probably wrote a short quick "Thanks for the message. I appreciate the kind words. You take care, BH"

It's just a nice reply without any demands or expectations. And then, after that, go be busy with your life. Enjoy the hot bod you now have and show it off! GAL GAL GAL!!!!!

[LL44]

Perfect response! ROOT is amazing.

[runningoutoftime]

Oooops! Sorry about the extra post.

Don't worry about OW and his relationship with her. Perhaps he does have to see if things will be good with her. One way to look at it is sometimes they need to spend a bit of time on the other side of the fence to realize it's just as green and full of weeds as the one they left. And the one they left is just not so bad... and that's where all the memories and their family is...

Try to enjoy having extra space and time away from your H. Use this time wisely as one for growth, self-exploration, healing, rediscovering yourself, etc... without the distraction of a husband. Look for those silver linings. They are there...

[runningoutoftime]

Oh Lwb, you make me blush! You are pretty amazing yourself...

[Starshyne]

I actually think things are sounds pretty positive in your sitch. Keeping doing a great job on your PMA. I could learn a lesson or 2 from you.

[No Longer BH]

Wow guys, you really know how to boost a down girl up. Here I was thinking that my sitch was probably hopeless, and you all come and make me feel better. Way down deep in the cobwebs of my mind I know that I have to focus only on me, but d@mn my heart still keeps getting in my way sometimes. I think its because the news of the OW is still so fresh. Good news though, I have been able to laugh these last couple of days, so I know I'm making progress. Dont think I could have done it without all of your support.

Some days I think that H is just soooo lost but feel certain that when he gets through this he is going to want his best friend back. Other days I think he is just going to start that friendship with OW. I've never met her, but H has been talking highly of her for 4 years now. Always says she is such a sweet/fun/great person. If he has thought that she is so wonderful for so long, he may not come back. Cross that bridge when I get there and have more strength to deal with it.

Thanks again.