Hi, T. I'm still lurking here! I feel a little emotionally involved here, having followed your thread for so long. I appreciate your response to my thread--I'm doing much better these days!
I hope you think about what he fell for in the beginning -- your personality. It really comes through on these posts -- your optimism, energy, (see quote above!) and personality. I think everyone who reads your posts can see that. I hope you don't feel compelled to "hold back" or make yourself "numb." You've done many 180's, so now's the time to show that. It might make you feel vulnerable, but there's a difference between vulnerable and needy. Vulnerablity can be engaging and human. Needy is always a turn-off. I suspect you're not really _needy_ right now, given all that you've gone through, are you? Be positive. Be your bubbly self. Be the person who he was attracted to and that he misses.
