For the record, I think there are ways to hug, without rescuing. Many was the time my wife would be alone in her room, crying, and I would let her be for a good hour, then I would tap on the door, ask her if she was okay, and I'd go in, give her a good strong hug, break the hug myself, and say something like "I'm sorry to see you in this pain" or "I'm sorry you're hurting." And i learned, when she said things like "I've really screwed things up," to say "Yes, it's a mess, but there's nothing we can't fix together if you end this thing now" rather than the OLD Puppy, which would have said "Oh, there there now, honey, I've been a knucklehead, too!" (and counted off the ways I'd screwed up).
