You have gotten great advice, let me add one thing.....you talk about it 'feeling' right or wrong to talk about the R, etc...Your 'feelings' may not be YOUR best barometer right now.
The lists were a GREAT idea. I like your journalling, but like sofaraway said....there's a lot going on in your head. Give yourself a vacation from all this stuff going on in your head. Just take a break. It will be good for you and the R.
I have a ton going on in my head right now. I need to slow down. I am detaching, but it isn't easy. I guess my rationalization for getting the bookcases is my boys. That's why I want them tonight. I want to have them set up and have all their books in there. It's not somethng she uses, I'm not punishing her, but even if it was something that she had attachment to or someting like that, my boys need to come first. Also, me not going to get them shows that I am not doing something that I said I was going to do. It also shows laziness. I guess it is my own edge of the sword, cuz I said I was going to do it.
I don't care what you think, as long as it's about me.
