I will survive

[redhottie]

I didn't realize I locked my thread. I wasn't even close to 21

Where to begin...as Kalni noticed, I'm calmer these days. It is as if I have found a sense of inner peace. I'm sure there will come a day when the tears and panic come back, but for now I'm ok with it being over. I don't want to continue on with H the way things are and have been. My H has being friendlier and more caring since I went dark for the few days last week. My T did say that often when a couple is going through a D they feel closer because the pressure is off.

Today was H's day with the Ds. At some point I sent a text to see if he was taking the Ds to church. H called me to say no, they wanted to wait till tomorrow. I told him I was out spending his money at a high end store. Amazingly he asked me to look for a particular item for him. I guess I should have been angry and should have said no. I know he would have taken that as me being nasty. I ended up finding the item and he appreciated it.

While I was on the phone he said he planned on taking the Ds to dinner and I was welcome to come. Again, I should have said no, at least my T would say so. I did tell him I didn't want to intrude on his time with them and he said I wouldn't. So I went to dinner with him and we all had a good time.

When leaving tonight I got a rub on the head...same thing the dogs got, but at least he touched me