hi Sophie, I do think things can get worse before they get better. My H got progressively worse...when we first S, he called everyday and came to see the kids... A bit later, the phone calls were less frequent, he would make excuses as to why he couldn't take the kids and financially I was on my own because H lost two jobs...the first which he held in management for over 10 years! I think the second lasted about 3 weeks.
Every aspect of his life was awful...including his young OW that forced him into filing for D. I think if he wasn't pushed he would have been a fence sitter too, I did not want a D so I did not do anything to help him.
I am also a teacher...7th grade English. I was left with the upkeep of the house and all the bills, luckily I am a much better money manager than H so I did ok paying the bills on time.
H and I have reconciled and he has been home almost a year. It has taken forgiveness in order to rebuild the trust we used to have. Things are good...once in a while I go through the "how could he...?" but I have learned how to stop myself before letting it ruin my day.
I do think you should seek legal counsel just for the financial support you need to raise the kids.
As far as H seeing them, you can't force that. That is his loss in the long run. My H truly regrets the time he did not spend with the kids...did not even come to D1's first birthday. Unfortunately, that is something he has to deal with for the rest of his life.
It sounds like you are very strong and are doing well managing things on your own. I know it is frustrating!
