He left then Cheated ---Now What???

[No Longer BH]

AD -

I know I need to focus on me. In fact I have been dbing for about 2 months before this happened and was doing great at GAL. The news of the affair just ripped my heart out. My breathe was taken away. I'm still in shocked. Cant eat, cant sleep. I know that this too will pass but it really sucks to be here right now.

As I stated earlier, I broke my NC with H today. First I replied to a vicious email that he sent with prob WAY too much compassion, then I called him because I knew he would not reply. He yelled at me, told me I had no right to go and stay with my family and I broke all trust he had in me. Funny, when I brought up that he broke the trust of marriage, he said he did not see it that way. He claims that I am turning our son against him because S sees me cry sometimes and I tell him its becuase I miss his dad and wish he would come home. S overheard a conversation with my mom about how I could not believe H would get a girlfriend. So, yes, despite my efforts, S does know that his dad has a girlfriend. When I told H, he blew up. Not my fault that he is the one acting in an amoral way. He should not be doing things that he would be ashamed of son knowing about.

Anyway, in the mits of our conversation he told me that his life is falling apart. Apparently he was just demoted at work. This is the job that 3 years ago hated so I said he should find a new one to become happy. Then when things turned and I was the reason for his unhappiness, the job was great and he resented me for trying to push him out of it. For the last two years I have heard nothing but it is so great, he is doing so great and he cant really work on R because job is so important. Looks like he could not keep that in order as well.

I am still unsure, though, if this is a MLC or if he has just decided to reinvent myself in order to find a new happiness. Any thoughts, PLEASE.