I have looked into seeing an individual counselor. I don't know if we will get to the marriage counselor. Neither of us is the spill our gut types. I was shaking just submitting this to an anonymous forum. I don't know all the changes I need to do. I have been reading alot of books, looking at websites, and trying talk about things.
The other day we pulled into the driveway and I started crying. He asked what is it. It was just that looking at our house from the road, it looks like a happy house. It looks like whoever is living there is happy, has a good marriage, and is content with their lives. It isn't a fancy house, it just looks like a cheery place to be. It looks homey. It just hit me that the world isn't the place I thought it was. It doesn't matter how good you are to someone, how devoted you have been, or how much you care. It is hard not to be hardened.
