There are times I feel like I have a good grip on my life...and those times are when I forget he is out there...you know, when hours go by and then something hits you..'OH..ya...my H is jerk...I forgot about that!'
I'm sorry Sophie....that one had me laughing so hard...you nailed it!!! LOL
He doesn't want to have to make a decision, he doesn't want to have to be responsible for paying bills on time, he doesn't want to have to be responsible for helping with soccer, just show up when it works for him....he just plain 'doesn't.
It's like they can't handle anything other than their job, and socializing with friends..kind of like when we were in high school, and we did our homework, and then went out to play. No one expected us to do much more than that.
If you do decide to seek legal representation, do so knowing that most lawyers will tell you that you shouldn't be in the precarious situation that you're in..and that there should be something on paper 'legally' so that your H will HAVE to carry his fair share of responsibility financially.
Having gone through what I did, I would intend to agree with them. I didn't want my D either, but I wish I would have started protecting myself earlier in the game. How your H would take your move consulting a L, I don't know...it could shake him up, or it could get things moving in a direction I don't think you're sure you want to take...at least not all the way down the road.
Think long and hard, but remember at this point, you are the one protecting yourself and the kids financially...he is not. He's really not capable of much at all at this point, other than taking care of himself.
I hope you'll be able to get him to some counseling/mediation. I wish things looked easier, but they're generally not
As suggested by others do what you need to do for you and the kids. Make your decisions according to those priorities.
Women are angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible
