I am a bit ticked off at me. I didn't have an R talk with H but I kind of had a stupid cheeseless tunnel "discussion" I showed that I didn't trust that he was telling me the truth and told him that he shouldn't lie to me. He claims he wasn't lying. There went the acting "as if" for the week!
Now he's curt with me and I'm hurt that he's being curt. Even though I know why he's in the mood he's in I feel bad about it. So I called him back and made it all about me. You see that is why I told people a few threads back that I'm really good at playing the martyr. I know how to avoid these "discussions" but keep having them anyways.
I think I'll try NC for 2 days (Tomorrow and Friday). I can't see him or hear him without wanting to yell at him for doing this to our family. I'm angry tonight for every little G damn thing and I had to get on here to vent so I don't call him and enter another cheeseless tunnel. I feel like a little mouse asking "where's the cheese?" and then smacking my head with the back of my hand and saying "F I did it again!!"
Agggh WAS are so -------------!! You can all fill in the blanks on that one.
Jen
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
