This isn't a forum I ever wanted to be posting in. But after several threads in the "Newcomers" forum, I'm here, now.
My marriage is over.
It failed for a few reasons, some of which I have learned over these past few months. I've owned up to my parts in the failure, but have come to know that I was outright lied to by my wife and someone who was supposed to be a friend.
They're not publicly together, but I know (not suspect, but know) that they both claim to "love" each other - which is a laugh, really, since their actions managed to break up two marriages in the end, but they're pretending they're just friends.
Regardless.
I'm here now. I'm taking some steps to get on with my new life. Have been for awhile, since I accepted that my marriage was over, and beyond saving...or, honestly, me wanting to save it.
It's only been 8 months since my wife left me. That's a long time to some, but we were together for 6 years and she was the onyl real relationship I ever had. And I was her only relationship.
I still miss her sometimes. Others I'm mad as hell at her. My former friend? I really, really want to see karma kick him in the crotch - and, while he's doubled over, in the face a couple of times. I've honestly thought that if he were to die in a car accident or get cancer, that it would actually please me. That worries me some, but high levels of betrayal are likely to bring out the nastier side of a person.
I'm back in school, pulling in enough money to get by, and taking it day by day.
The woman I loved and married is gone. THat's one thing I remind myself of whenever I miss her. There's someone out there who looks like her and has her same name, but the good person she was is gone - dead. All that's left is a shallow, self-centered, "I'm right" bitch. Qualities she inherited from my former friend.
I avoid contact as much as possible, except when it's necessary or unavoidable.
I'm doing okay.
I'm still a little angry. I'm still hurt. But I'm walking towards that better tomorrow.
[quote] Your heart's got a heavy load There's still a long way to go Keep your eyes on the road [quote]
