Last summer when my wife was having her affair, she went out one night, and I was sure she was going to see OM. She claimed it was just a party "with some people from work," but I looked her square in the eyes and said "I HOPE you're not going to see your boyfriend, because that would be incredibly disrespectful to the family" (we had just taken the boys to see the 4th of July fireworks, and now she was leaving us while me and the boys were doing our traditional blow-the-fireworks-off-in-the-driveway thing). She INSISTED she wasn't.
Anyway, I knew she was, and I turned out all the outside and inside lights on her, and locked the house up tight. Well, what was CLASSIC about it was, since I had put a voice-activated recorder in her car, I was able to actually hear her, the next day, when I played it back, say:
(muttering under her breath): "I can't believe it. He turned teh F$#*ing lights out on me. What an ass." This, after hearing her meet up with OM, recalling the whole "I HOPE you're not going to see your boyfriend" story to him, a bunch of "ILYs," etc.
Sometimes, you just gotta find the fun in the middle of the hell.
