That's the thing. He's practically her cousin. So you can't really ever feel like you are as good friends with her family as she is. If something happens, they will always choose her.
I always make it a policy to go through my partner for them to deal with their family. And it seems like it's just like if you wanted to go meet one of your guy friends for a beer, and she complained that she should be able to come along too always.
I think the difference here is that
1. Her buddy is a man 2. He's not REALLY her relative, it's her cousin's H and 3. She almost slept with him once
She really shouldn't have told you that. You could have probably gone your whole life not knowing that. It really threw an extra wrench into the works.
Now having said all this, I don't believe in men and women continuing to hang out with opposite sex friends without their partner once they are together, especially on a regular basis.
I hung out and got a beer once in the two years we've been together, with a guy friend who I was friends with before. I never hung out regularly with him before either.
That's another thing, if she was hanging out with a guy who she befriended AFTER you were already together, that's a big no no.
But when it's a friend she already had, the lines are blurred. The lines are blurred even more because he's kind of family.
And then on the OTHER side, the lines are blurred because of the almost sex thing.
AND if it bothered you this much, if she was committed to you, she should have stopped hanging out with him alone.
But then again, if that was the only thing that bothered you, perhaps I would think that. But because you have put so many stipulations or complaints on everything she does, everywhere she goes, everyone she hangs out with without you, it kind of takes away from winning on this one thing, because it looks like you are trying to control her generally in every aspect.
I think the best thing you can do now is go dark.
How many years ago did she tell you about the almost-sex thing?
