"When she returned home, she was upset with me because "I couldn't even talk to her on the phone, when all she wanted to do was have a conversation with her H like normal people do""
Hi,
OK first of all "normal people" don't choose to take a vacation excluding their husband. Unless there are other details I don't know about (your/her time off from work availability, etc), there is something very wrong here.
"Now that I look at this technique of "going dark," I'm obviously concerned with this sort of reaction backfiring on me."
It did not backfire on you. She came home upset because she could get a hold of you. This is a productive reaction. In a sense, she was the pursuer now, not you.
I think what happened was you get anxious when she gets angry at you and so you are afraid of her leaving you, so her upset, upset you. But in truth, your going dark worked.
