Cinders, that is no longer my question or my quest. It is rather, what sort of person do I want to be, and what is required of me by God?
Yes, I still love my husband, or the person that he was, but I am no longer the person he left, and I want a better marriage than the one I had, good though it was.
I truly want to be the best person I can be - which sounds a bit priggish, but marriage restoration would be one of the possible outcomes, and not the only one. Like St Paul I want to learn to be content in whatever situation I find myself. Bad things happen to lots of people, and they cope. It is how we respond to what life throws at us that matters.
And we have all grown and changed so much, I am proud to know so many people on these boards. They are heroes and heroines, so many of them, raising their kids acting kindly towards their souses, in the face of much provocation.
