H is Having Affair after all - Part 2

[Evie]

Seek, thanks. I don't plan to mess H around. I agreed to sell the house b/c the alternative option is one that doesn't lend to a clean break and it means i would have to have a mortgage and would be stretching myself to the limit. The alternative is too complicated and it would anger him. When the kids had their melt down last week, it through me into a spin and I panicked, i have being feeling really low all week. If i moved it wouldn't have any impact on the amount of times i would bump into her, not unless i moved towns and I'm not uprooting my kids or myself or changing jobs at this stage.

Working on my strengths is a good idea. I know i'm sociable and friendly and not shy but i'm also a home bird. When I look back now, I can see that H was bored and restless in the home. I felt that I carried him in the family for over 2 years, I did it happily b/c at the time I didn't know any different and thought he was just tired from work. Now I can see how much more energy he seems to have I have realised how much i did do and at the end of the day, i didn't have any energy much energy left and I used to complain to H that I had no support from him, no respite, no family time or couple time together. He complains of teh same thing, but i didn't really see much evidence of him working or wanting to change things.

If his actions are anything to go by, then he seems to be detaching even more. He seems very happy with his life now, which makes me feel sad. I don't want the old M back as neither of us was happy with that, but i still love him and want the chance to work on what we can have again. He contacts me less now and when he does its about the boys mainly. I can see him slipping further and further away and he doesn't seem bothered, he doesn't seem to even miss me or our family.