Supermom and the Brighter Tomorrow

[girlfromipanema]

Thinking of you, Jenny. Hope you're doing well.

Big hugs!

[redhottie]

Jenny,
I'm proud of how strong you remain and how good you are at moving forward. My H finally articulated verbally the other day that he wants a D. I now need to get moving with my life. I am going to keep thinking of you and asking myself "What would Jenny do?"

I'm sorry the fog won't lift from around your H. I hope it does soon for the sake of your children.

[W2G]

Hi JennyF,

I saw on Facebook what Monday is.. so I just want you to have a fabulous day!!!

Check in when you can.

Hugs,
W2G

[JennyF]

Hi there,
Lizzy you're too funny....

"What would Jenny do?"

My motto lately has been, just do the next thing you have to do...then the next thing after that. If I think about it all at once it's too daunting and that's when the emotion comes flooding in. Try not to think of 'getting on with your life' as one big task you need to accomplish, just focus on the day to day and before you know you're actually getting on with your life.

On that note I have some major decisions to make....and it feels like all at once. H has really taken a back seat with this whole house selling thing...I'm doing it all on my own and it is exhausting...not to mention nerve racking.
There was an open house (not easy to get the house ready for this with the kids...but it worked out thanks to help from some friends).
In a nutshell....
- I need to drop the price on my house because after 2 weeks there's no one biting
- H's financials are in and suspiciously there is one page missing...the page with his debts...interesting. I hope to get that sorted out with my L tomorrow.
- The house I want just dropped in price (YEAH!!), but apparently someone else may be interested so I hope to be putting in a conditional offer by Tuesday.

There is so much going on and the kids are keeping me so busy I feel completely spent right now. I'm quite intimidated by this whole house thing (we bought this house new before it was built so I've never done this before).

SO...I'll just do the next thing I can do and hope it all falls into place.

I had a good weekend with D & S. We went to Rib festival in the park yesterday with a whole bunch of friends...it was hectic, but fun. H is out of town for the week so I have the kids all to myself for 7 days....I better get to bed if I'm going to get through it!!

Yes W2G...tomorrow is my "big day". I've never had a problem with b-days or getting older but for some reason 35 is hitting me a bit harder....it's probably because of the sitch. Oh well....at least I'm still a lot younger than OW!! LOL!

Any thoughts or advice on the house thing is appreciated....I'm a bit lost.
J~

[redhottie]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Hey you forgot to mention that you are better looking than the OW too.

Thanks for the advice. I guess I do try to see the whole big picture at once. I'll try to break it up into puzzle pieces. (Not 1000 pieces though, those are too hard to put together.)

[girlfromipanema]

Happy Birthday, Jenny!!!

I turned 35 in February. With my current relationship status, it wasn't my most favorite of birthdays. We don't have kids yet and if things don't work out with us, it may be too late for me to have them in the future. Scary. I've lied to a couple of people and told them I was 34. =)

You'll get through this house thing. I'm just sorry it's all on you and your h isn't helping at all. They say buying/selling a home is one of the most stressful things you can do. Divorce, I believe, is THE most stressful (even before the death of a loved one).

[JennyF]

Thanks for the Birthday wishes. Unfortunately I found this morning that another offer was accepted for the house I wanted.
Oh well....guess it wasn't meant to be. That just means something better is out there for me....

girlfromipanema.....don't forget how quickly things can change...you've got lots of time to be a mommy!!

J~

[blindsided1]

Jenny - Happy Belated birthday. I hope it turned out very wonderful for you. Sorry about the house. That sucks. But, you are right, there is probably something better waiting for you. Hope you're doing okay. I was thinking of you.

[phbear316]

Hi Jenny

Happy Birthday, sorry I missed it. Hope the day was wonderful!!! : )

Sorry about the house, you are right though something better is out there, just this one was not meant to be. Hold on though something may happen with their offer, you never know

hugs
bear

[JennyF]

It's been a week since I've posted. It's been a rollercoaster of a week.
First I thought I had a chance for that house again as the deal almost fell through, but it was firmed up over the weekend so it's officially gone.
My house isn't getting bites at all, even after 2 open houses. It's priced too high. The problem now is that if we drop it too much further, we risk losing money. So now I need to a conversation with H about what to do. Neither of us can afford to lose money and I refuse to buy him out for some piddly difference so I can carry a higher mortgage! No F'ing way.
So we'll see what he has to say when we discuss it tomorrow.

I had an ok weekend with the kids gone. I feel awful the whole time they're gone. I can handle the time on my home, but knowing they're in that house with 'her' is sickening to me. I hate it.

H has been up and down. Nice one day and not the next. He look really skinny when I saw him on Sunday, his cheeks are actually looking sunken in.

H e-mailed my best friends today saying that "he knows they're not happy with him right now but he wants to talk to them. He said he loves them misses them and wants to fix the disconnect between them". My best friend dying to unload on him, so I guess we'll see what happens.
Ever since I heard about this note today, I've been down. I even cried about and I don't do that often any more.
I was hurtful to think that he 'loves and misses them' and 'wants to fix the disconnect'...but I never meant enough for this? How is that is other relationships deserve attention, caring and work and ours didn't? What sense does that make.
Perhaps this is the 'reconnecting' that they talk about in the MLC stages. The slowly make there way back by reconnecting with the people in the reverse order of how he let them go. The spouse being the last. Wishful thinking...

No matter how ok I am with moving on and no matter how much of a better life I now envision for myself...I don't think I'll ever stop looking for H's epiphany. I keep expecting him to wake up and break down. It seems inevitable to me and to everyone else.

It will be interesting to see what our friends have to say to him.

Other than that things are crazy busy. I had the kids for 7 days straight on my own (hence the not posting). D was an angel by the end of it. The last 3 days she slept in her own bed. I think she really enjoyed being in the same bed for that many nights in a row. Poor thing. Then after 2 nights at H's she's back to sleeping in my bed again. I told H about this and like everything else he just brushed it off. A$$#@LE.
How can you downplay what is happening to your 3 year old daughter?? I don't get it.

I guess that's it for now....
J~