Can I give him a kind, immediate kick in the a$$ into stage 3?
Somehow I think that would be more 'conscious compliance' than 'conscious competence'
Hehehe!
GFI - Yes, in the last week or so, he's said that he wants full custody of the boys. He was also pushing for it the last several months prior to him moving back in.
He really does love the boys, but in my honest opinion, it is about the money. He does not want to give me ONE CENT. This was also an issue from the start. Before he was leaning towards wanting full custody, he was always trying to get me to agree to a certain amount per month and promise to not ever come after him for more. He also did not want his wages garnished; he wanted me to trust him that "the check was in the mail".
HA! FAT CHANCE. In EVERY sitch that I am aware of (in my family, circle of friends, and in H's), those promised checks NEVER came, and the single moms in these sitches were always struggling to get what was owed to the kids. I will not agree to such a thing, and I don't care if H doesn't like it either.
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
Well, with as many hours as he works and the unpredictability of his schedule, and since he was hardly there for the majority of S3's life, I can't see a court going for that. In legal terms, you are quite obviously the primary caregiver.
As far as dealing with your H...I think the best thing might be to just say that if it comes to that, the Ls and the judge will figure all the details out. That you just want him to be happy and what's best for your children.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
There's no logical way he'd get full custody. And there isn't any way I can see he would want it, except to avoid child support. I think you are very smart to be careful there. His view of the world, and right, and wrong, is a bit off right now. Careful is very good.
Well, with as many hours as he works and the unpredictability of his schedule, and since he was hardly there for the majority of S3's life, I can't see a court going for that. In legal terms, you are quite obviously the primary caregiver.
As far as dealing with your H...I think the best thing might be to just say that if it comes to that, the Ls and the judge will figure all the details out. That you just want him to be happy and what's best for your children.
Originally Posted By: dry_heat
There's no logical way he'd get full custody.
You're both right. My ATTY even said this.
I have also always told H that I am not out to take everything he has. I'm not trying to "clean him out". I just want whatever the court says the kids and I are entitled to and what is fair. Nothing more.
But yeah, it's still all so unfair to H.
(((((((Thanks, Tal, Michelle, and Jeff)))))))
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
