That is great that he told you that he has actually thought about coming home and from some of your posts it seems like you are on your way to accomplishing many of the things on his list. I would use your trip as a great point to show some of that. I wouldn't contact him, let him pursuit you. I would also do a lot of things with your daughter, independent type things. If he calls and talks to her, she can say mommy took me to do this mommy took me to do that. Keep up the good work!!
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
Today he came by again even though this AM he said he wouldn't be around because he'd be very busy. He needed to drop something off and he stayed. A little later into the visit I got annoyed about him being on the phone so much (dumb yep) but said nothing to him about it and I left to go to a friends house for a chat. 45 minutes later he sent me a message asking where I ran off to. I went back home and he was getting ready to leave. I asked him to stick around and I'd cook lunch. He agreed. I cooked and then we ate. He stuck around and had a nap after lunch and later we were sitting on the sofa talking. He apologized for being a D**k. We chatted about this and that. He said he had a good nap and it's strange because he can only sleep well here. At his parents house he said he can't sleep. I said nothing.
My friend thinks he's almost ready to come home. All I have to do is follow the rules and do what's necessary. Just a matter of time I hope. I'm praying so hard that he decides to come back.
Jen
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
That sounds great!!!!! Just keep your cool! Keep to the plan, it very much sounds like it is working. I love the part about going to a friends house to chat when he was on the phone....very independent! Him staying for lunch and a nap is good too....I could use a good nap
I'm excited for you. Perhaps him getting the papers in place is really starting to sink in for him.
Keep up the good DB work...I have a feeling that this trip is going to be very good for you
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
Jen, your H has laid out the road map for you. All you need to do is follow it. Yes, you CAN do it! You've been making so much progress over the last several weeks. You know what you need to do. This is great!!!
Me47 H46 S13 M16 Piecing since May/09
"Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." Lou Holtz
Yes I can do it and I know H is paying attention. He told me two nights ago that I needed to set my goals and work to achieve them. I feel like he's read DB or DR LOL!
He said yesterday that he doesn't like his T because she makes him think and puts doubts in his head about his decisions. He isn't a fan of Dr. anyways and he has always said they play with people heads. I just smiled and talked to him about things in general. I think T was the best thing he ever did
Addie: thanks for noticing the changes. You've been a great support.
TD: I left the apartment because I was pi$$ed not because I wanted to be independant. I left because if not I would have started fighting with him.
We'll see what happens this weekend since his cousin is visiting. Hopefully they'll make plans tonight and he'll ask me along. XX (fingers crossed)
Jen
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
Yes you're right because the end result was rewarding (H didn't leave like he had planned). The DBing part was that I left the apartment when I wasn't impressed and vented to a friend instead of to H. I think he was surprised that I didn't jump at him when I came home.
I've noticed he's changed a bit towards me. He's sweeter and more open.
Jen
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
I am very new to this whole DB thing.....but from a novices standpoint that sounded like a textbook 180! Good job. It is nice to see how these work in someone elses relationship. Thanks for sharing it
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
Jen, good luck this weekend with H's relatives in town. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed that H includes you in some of the plans. Then you can DB your little heart out.
Me47 H46 S13 M16 Piecing since May/09
"Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." Lou Holtz
