Thanks, NNP. The marital settlement says every other weekend, but that doesn't fit into his work schedule (he is out of town for his job and doesn't often have weekends off). I agree that a consistant time would help all of us (at least D17 and me).
Has your Daughter ever told her Dad that she would like to spend more time with him? Maybe you should encourage her to take the opportunity to tell him how she feels. Somehow the same words coming from them make more of an impact. Besides that, he can't twist it and say that those are your words.
I think the e-mail telling him when she will arrive is a good idea, Short and sweet. Don't feel guilty because you need some time to yourself. We all do, and when we get it it only makes us a better parent.
I agree with Beth on this. You need to take a step back and let them work on their R. And you do need time for you. I feel it does help us to be a better parent.
Funny thing My oldest D had me e-mailing my frien d who is having a sale on when she could bring her stuff to friends house. To make a long story short after about the fourth e-mail I gave the address to D and said you need to do this yourself. I fell much more relaxed! and they took care of it themselves.
Have a good day
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
THANK YOU! I do see that I should let D17 and her dad work it out.....but then I have been frustrated that he never thinks to invite her for overnight! D17 feels like her dad doesn't listen to her (duh??) Her dad says she can come "any time", but when she calls him he is often too busy.
I need to help D17 be assertive and express her needs (unlike her mother!)
and they took care of it themselves. 