After 3 long years, H is home - II

[GoingForward]

Well, since asking usually gets a "yes" response, I would say try applying the "ask for what you want" stuff out of DB. Might actually make a big difference if he says "yes" enough.

I'll have to revisit DR. It's been awhile.

It's rough to be doing it basically alone. All I can really say is that if you get D, that won't change. So perhaps giving him some time to deal with his stuff is the way to get that old H back.

I understand this.

I suppose I've been expecting things to change though, especially in helping me out with the boys. He told me that when he moved back in, he wouldn't have to work as much, and that he understood how important it was for him to be here. Not just for me, but for the boys. He promised me this would not happen.

Believe nothing you hear and less than half of what you see.

I'm not even sure if the old H is in there. Every once in awhile, I see glimpses of kindness, but the anger......He NEVER used to be THIS angry all the time about everything.

Financially, H agreed to still pay for everything. He wanted the kids and I to remain in the house. (He always held this over my head, too.)

Did you smile, say "thank you. I'm glad the court didn't have to order you to keep a roof over your childrens' heads AND pay their child care costs"???

LOL!

I always told him just how much I appreciated that. I know he didn't have to keep us in the house and agree to continue paying all of our bills. A L he had a consultation with advised him to give us nothing until we went to court, but he said he couldn't do that.

Those talks occurred during decent times.

However, when/if we were arguing, it was always, "Just remember who pays the bills around here", "Who pays for your internet service again?", or "Who pays for the food you shove in your face?"

A$$.

I would tell him he could stop anytime he wanted to, and the court probably wouldn't look too kindly on that sort of thing, but he could if he wanted to. The kids and I would eventually get that back-pay. How would he feel about being ordered to cut me an extra check for $xxxxx?

Besides, what he was giving us every month to remain in the house is about $1500 less than what the court would order him to in the event of D. My ATTY said I could ask for that difference, but I really have no desire to.

Not yet. J/k!