Karen, I think you did a wonderful job and conducted yourself with dignity and grace. Well done-this was so hard. ps how many fingers did you manage to break with the handshake? I know I confess to a vengeful streak at times.
Naej, I do like the way you think.
WB, you already know what I think and that's pretty much what everyone else has said. To quote Randy Jackson, "You da bomb, baby!" I didn't want to say dawg...
So, you had K's new woman at the grad AND you missed Disneyland??? Oh my GOD - I thought I Had a bad couple of days! That sucks!
Seriously sweetie. The grad sounds wonderful. You were charming and beautiful no doubt. The woman had no place there but your ex is INTIMIDATED by your engagement no doubt. And he has to compete. Only someone VERY insecure would have to compete. Let it go. (yeah, spoken by MOI who has trouble letting ANYTHING go!)
If maggot was at the grad I'd puke, but if I had to be introduced, I'd want to be gracious just like you.
C2H makes a wonderful point (as always). All things work for the greater good. C'mon Ms K - whod have ever thought after all the pain that you and I would end up with 2 such wonderful new guys. And kept our homes. And our kids still think we're the greatest. It is all so perfect really. All things work for the greater good.
Oh my goodness I am just reading through all these posts and my eyes are literally welling up!
You guys are sooo amazing! ( I have that word on my mind since being w/ my tween niece all weekend!) but thats a perf word for you guys. You've all made me feel sooo good and , well NORMAL! lol
I will be back to reply soon, S finally moved home today and we are trying to cram stuff everywhere!
Love you guys!!!
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
WHEWWWWWWWWWWWW..now that's over with! It's something that we all think about and stress over, but for you, it's over and you handled it. Ok, so it's a goodthing that people can't see the dread we feel. The best part is that it was Ry's day and for him it was a great one.
You know K that I have my own theory on how and why this all went down. I think he brought OW because he has no one else. You have your WHOLE family and he would have been alone in the crowd. Besides that, I would imagine that seeing your family after all this time, and their being so gracious, would leave him with much to think about. Even though he chose to leave, and now finds himself on the outside looking in, he has to be thinking about what he gave up and whether it was worth it. They were his family as well, and with all he's done, they still extended an olive branch. Pretty cool of them!
It's been long enough with a big enough separation from you, where now things just might not look as they did 6 years ago. I know someone who said that when they were in this position and enough time had passed, they now saw that it all could have been handled so differently.
I would bet anything that your thinking he probably feels as if he got away with something is way off base and nowhere near what has been going through his head since the graduation!
Glad all went well with the grad and like everyone has said, you are an inspiration. You took that icky situation and stood out with respect and dignity.
Hi guys Again thankyou for all this, Its really given me a lot to think about! I knew that someone would relate!lol It seems we all go thru very similar scenerios and feelings.
Fig, yes you are right, if she was there for my S, I appreciate that, she may of been according to S, shes very nice , I'm sure she is. She wasnt the OW as far as I know- she is prolly struggling w/ a few things w/ my ex now too - poor thing lol
Bethie I totally love what you said that he may now look and see that he did give up a nice family, a family who comes together whenever there is something important going on in anyones life- and they loved him dearly at one time and he has given that up, she may have a nice family too but after all, my family had known ex since he was 19! His family is all over the country and not really as close knit , he may of seen that he gave that up too.
I have to tell ya tho Naej, I am thinking the idea of broken fingers did cross my mind ,,if i had time to think about it! LOL
Thank you guys! I have come to the conclusion it dosnt really matter why she was there, I do know my S knows whats what. I had my wonderful B by my side, and he WAS there for the right reason! and thats whats important!
Once again, great advice and support
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
Oh and Trip I dont know about Misty missing me but i sure missed her!
I called my gf sun and was anxious to hear how she was she said she was sooo cute! she had never seen her, but said ohhh shes a biter! oh yea, a habit i need to break. I did miss her furry lil self tho!
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
Going to a couple of Barbques, so outta here pretty soon
Think the rain has stopped!
Spent all day yesterday , helping moving S home , wheww what a job! and for the second time in a week had to co-exsist w/ ex- we were busy so that helped and after we all went out to dinner, at times a little awkward, but after spending time , and meeting maybe OW last week, I feel very OK now, settled more.
It takes a while to sink in , but I dont feel that OW is better then me, or prettier or a better person, shes just different and not me, not part of ex past, thats all thats what he wanted, its not about me after all!!!
and he didnt not get away w/ murder, or win in the end, cause I have my wonderful B on his way over and we are going to enjoy a great weekend, w/ friends and family and each ohter, so in the end, I AM THE WINNER , and my S is home, here home!
Have a great weekend and be safe!
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
I have come to the conclusion it dosnt really matter why she was there, I do know my S knows whats what. I had my wonderful B by my side, and he WAS there for the right reason! and thats whats important!
Also, it was good for Ry's sake that he was there, it was his day and to not be there would have been something Ry would always remember.
Bethie's points were also a great other perspective and likely the very reasons OW was there, his support system.
As for comparing OW to you, totally irrelevant. We know the dissatisfaction so many WAS's experience which lead them to walk away is based in their inability to find contentment in and satisfaction in their lives- it is their problem although they blame the LBS. So, you could have been perfect and he still would have been dissatisfied.
When and if I get married again, I know X will do some sort of comparison even though she is the one that left me. Although "chemistry" is important, Ms. Right may very well not be as attractive or fashionable etc and X may even feel a bit smug, thinking I had it good with her. All that really matters is that you, I or our dear imaginary friends are happy with the new mates who come into our lives and we know B floats your boat.
Enjoy the BBQ's!
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
It seems to me you handled a difficult situation very well. I think those of us with "older" children are in a different spot than those with younger children who have to deal w/ custody issues etc. You, I and Bethie and others had teenagers that wanted nothing to do with their Dads at the time of the bomb. In some ways (for me anyway) that made it easier to move on.
I have a friend whose H left her for another woman when she had 3 young ones at home. It was so important for her that her kids have a R w/ their dad, who lives 6 hours away. She worked through so much to develop a working relationship w/OW. Her reasoning being that this OW would be around her kids whenever they are visiting their D. Also there was a new baby. The older 3 kids love their little brother. It is amazing to see all of them together...like I did 2 years ago when the oldest graduated HS.
I like what wonder said. One more milestone under your belt. You must be so proud of Ry tho!
Congratulations, SG
Survival Goddess "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." -Alice Walker
I didn't want to say dawg... 
