KAW, the cycle how I see it, is he gets in this grumpy/stone mood where when he comes home he will shoot looks at me and doesn't come near me to say hello/hug. I get the, oh no, something is wrong feeling in my stomach and begin to get upset--what is wrong, is it me (if it is work he will usually share it), then I feel I need to cheer him up, and ask what is wrong, and start feeling like the whole relationship is going downhill. What I want is a reassurance that the whole thing is not collapsing, but of course he won't give me that, not even when things are going well. So why should I expect it then? When he is like this, I start needing things more from him--hugs, conversation, I don't get it, I get grumpy and thus the cycle. Classic stuff, and things I should know better than to fall into the trap of doing. I just feel my resolve slipping.
Been there...done that (heck, doing that!). Have you read "men are from mars..."? It may help you a bit to depersonalize the cycle you guys seem to be in a bit right now. Also, what about applying some DB principles (180s, etc) to getting yourself unstuck??
Hang in there!
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
