I think she wants to be friends

[sleeper]

Yes the all seeing, all knowing eye of the thread has locked. Must mean a change in the sitch.

W called this AM. Ended up being about a 45 minute talk. We began talking about our children, then talked about the economy, the safety of the neighborhood I live in and finally Summer vacation. I think this may have been the longest convo we have had except for spews since we separated.

She brought up Summer vacation again (the 5th time) and mentioned "how hard it is to watch two young children at the beach alone." I told her I would be more than happy to go along. I think she was feeling me out on if I would go with her and the kids. I refused to go last year, although invited (and expected). I took the opportunity to explain why I didn't go and apologize for some of the things I said when she returned and reamed me. She listened.

One of the last things she said was about restructuring and paying our debt down. This comment really blew me away as the last discussions about our finances had to do with splitting them up.

Only time will tell. For now I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing: being her friend, helping her when she asks for it, anticipating what she might need but not overdoing it, responding to her anger (when it happens) with patience and kindness.

I think that's one thing that has blown her away. She really expected me to get angry and become confrontational when the FS stuff hit. Instead I showed concern for her financial well being and asked to take on more of the debt. This was obviously the opposite of what she expected.

Ironically it wasn't part of any plan I had either.