Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I am sick to death of this emotional rollercoaster. I feel so sad, and I am stuck at work so I can't have the breakdown I know I need to have. Sometimes I feel like I am just getting by from one day to another, never knowing what is going to happen, not knowing whether to give up hope or continue. I would not wish this upon my worst enemy. I don't think I have ever felt this horrible before in my life, though I am sure I have. Its like this darkness consumes me at times, and at times I see light at the end of the tunnel. I guess this is one of my darker moments.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I ended up using a lot of sick days during the two weeks I was living with my H and he was carrying on this A openly, then the first 6 weeks I moved out. I would have good and bad days.
I still do. But they're less extreme, and more good than bad. It gets better. Time does help.
((((((Lola))))))
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
I know. I am, however, at a new job. The other thing is its not like this is new. We have been separated for seven months. You would think at some point I would start to feel better. I am not sure if it is because I have pushed it aside not to deal with it at all, or I have been through this denial phase. I still don't feel like my marriage is over. I still feel that there is hope. But part of me wants to just move on a bit and heal, and I wonder...if I heal, does that mean I don't want to be married anymore?
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Oh Thank God. I still haven't received my book in the mail, and I thought it meant completely letting go. Whew.
Thanks Michelle. That is such a huge relief.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
In my mind, detaching is about giving up expectations. (I.e. expecting him to call, expecting him to send gifts for special occasions, expecting him to actually act like your H). It absolutely 100% does NOT mean giving up hope that he might do those things in the future. Detaching also means not letting his moods affect you, and finding ways to make yourself happy. Detaching is about being happy with who you are and how you have handled this crisis. Detachment means KNOWING deep down in your heart and your gut that no matter what crap he pulls, you will be 100% fine in the future.
Does that help?
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
Yes. Unbelievably. Thank you. It seriously is like a weight off my shoulders. I thought in order to detach, I needed to give up all hope of the possibility of future.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Yes. Unbelievably. Thank you. It seriously is like a weight off my shoulders. I thought in order to detach, I needed to give up all hope of the possibility of future.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
