I've read your entire thread here and do see a lot of positives. I understand exactly how you feel as I've been there myself. What happend in my sit is not entirely relevant but for one part. You seem to be teetering between is this what I want or not, but hiding it. I feel confident that in my sitch my h did not start to consider coming home until I was very close to no longer having the door open for him to do so. I waited to tell him that but eventually I did. It seemed like knowing or at least believing that he could always just come home kept him away even when I was no longer saying he could or asking or even acting like it mattered if he did or not. When I finally told him that the choice may no longer be his that the door to that possibility would soon close for him (I was feeling better and OK with him not being with me, finally happy again, confident, GAl and all that) something changed. Was it a risk? sure knowing that I might not take him back could have and may have made it more difficult for him to say he might want to but I think my letting him know the option would not forever be there helped to push him along.
