The door is offically closed

[inspiredjulie]

((((Kym))))

Sorry sweets. Thinking of you!

[bright_new_day]

I just read somewhere here that our hearts might stay swiss-cheese, that we get past it but never really get over it.

Don't deny how you are feeling (it will only prolong the process)--you are the NORMAL one who feels sadness at this!

Very well put. I totally agree that WE are the normal ones, because we grieve and we feel the loss. The WAS's move right into another relationship (so many of them do that part BEFORE the M ends !!!) and that is not NORMAL. That is aviodance, denial, etc. How very sad for them, and for the person they pull into their dysfunction! (Although I have a hard time feeling any pity for a person who gets involved with someone who is married.....they reap what they sow !!!)

[No_More_Dodo]

Hmmmm....... Where does it say "good things happen to good people"? I have never seen "Karma" "What comes around goes around" or anything like that. No S.P. unfortunately life doesn't work that way, its unfair, unjust, and simply, just the way it is. We either get past and get over the wrongs people do to us in life, or we go get even with them. At least what the individual considers as even, others may not. I don't mean to be so cool with this analagy, but this is what I have seen in my life experience.

braveheart,

I understand how you may feel that way. However, what we need to realize is we do NOT see everything going on in our ex's lives. We ONLY see the facade.

Think about it, for those with WASs..... Many of us had no clue they were so "unhappy"... Yet, we lived with them.... Spent lots of time with them..... How difficult would it be to APPEAR to be happy to friends, family and LBS? That would be VERY easy.

They could be very unhappy and have a plethora of issues. The OM/OW could have turned out to be a nightmare.... Yet, these people want to appear to have made the "right decision."

To make a long story short.... You will probably never see exactly how your ex reaps what your ex sows. I can pretty much guarantee it will happen......

Take Care,

NMD

[shoeprincess]

thanks everyone, BH, Fig, Julie, whatisis, BND,NMDD.
all very good, postive responses. With me soaking my head in the ol punch bowl, I forgot to mention a bright spot in my weekend. I took Tyson to the vet to have his kidney levels checked and they are within normal range! So I am just to keep giving him fluids and bland diet. So bad news Friday but awsome news on Saturday. As I was driving back from the vet with Tyson on my lap I broke down. I thanked god for giving Tyson the stregnth to pull through. I dont have a job but I have my baby boy and right now that's ok with me.

[bright_new_day]

I will be in So Cal late June/early July. I will be in Orange county first, then down to San Diego area. I would love to meet some DBers!!!!!!!

[SallyM]

(((HUGS))) shoe. and I agree with NMD here. I long saw h and his life going swimmingly along since our separation...truly, good things seemed to keep landing in his lap and I wondered. but all I saw was the facade. I have since learned that there was stuff that was NOT going well in his life. not even close. just remember, noones life is sunshine and roses 24/7. keep being the good person you are...you will reap the benefits one way or another.

[shoeprincess]

so true Sally about what NMD said. The more I read it the more sense it makes

keep being the good person you are...you will reap the benefits one way or another.

awww thanks Sally. That was really nice. And I will.

[braveheart]

Been a bad week for me. Found out my X got married a few weeks ago. I knew it was going to happen but for some reason it is still hard to swallow. Then friday I was layed off again. So here I am jobless and left wondering what direction my life is going. Can't help but think about how X's life seems to be sailing along just fine. He is re married, working on becoming a photographer . I guess he had a showing of some of his work at a winery this weekend. Yes I am having a pitty party. He is the one who did wrong not me? I thought good things were supposed to happen to good people? Not reward the bad ones. ugg. And to top off my friday, I was waiting at a light to turn, and who drives by? OW. Soemthing tells me I have not moved on and I am not over what has happend. Why cant I let it go? I know people say dont let the WAS's actions effect your emotions but come on.. It happens and we can't deny it. Please dont' beat me too hard with the 2x4. I am already low. Thanks for listining.

Hmmmm....... Where does it say "good things happen to good people"? I have never seen "Karma" "What comes around goes around" or anything like that. No S.P. unfortunately life doesn't work that way, its unfair, unjust, and simply, just the way it is. We either get past and get over the wrongs people do to us in life, or we go get even with them. At least what the individual considers as even, others may not. I don't mean to be so cool with this analagy, but this is what I have seen in my life experience.

Wow. Must suck being you, with that outlook, BraveHeart.

I see good things happen every day to good people, and karma's alive and well too. Now, karma's cousin Murphy is out there playing with us all too, but the good's out there for us.

Shoe, the good is there when you're done processing the bad. Plain and simple. Everything happens in its own time. Your time's still coming.

Braveheart, I would hazard a guess that your is too.

Bighands, It doesn't suck being me, I like being me, lots of other people like me. Unfortunately, not everyone likes me because of how I see things. I do not put any trust into luck or karma, and the like.

[BigHands]

And that must suck. Because placing no trust into any belief that goodness in yourself will bring goodness anywhere else shows no motivation for goodness in yourself.

I am by no means saying you're unlikable. I don't know you, and I have a hunch that you and I could discuss some doosies.

But what you call misplaced trust in luck or karma, on several others' threads now, I call faith and hope. And I see nothing wrong, or worthy of being called out, with having faith or hope. To me, faith and hope are the seeds of love. And who couldn't use a little more of that?

[fig]

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I love those seeds!!!

(sorry for idle chit-chat)