Running - I know you are right - but I am in so much pain I hardly function, I know what is right, I know I have no chances, sometime I feel OK and I do behave accordingly. But when the pain start rising I can't reson straight - I only know I don't want to lose my family. For me, with the value I have been raised, my family was a way of life, and I thought it was the same for W, for me was a done deal. Detaching the way should be done is hard, because I see W everyday when we deal with the kids. Besides my D4 always always tells me when W is out with OM, and this upsets me. I am afraid of what is my D4 thinks, she is so young, she will soon forget we were once a unite family, this kills me... Too often I don't feel doing anything for me. I would happily give a finger not to feel this pain.
