Sara,

If he is serious about this, there's absolutely no reason why he can't "end this" RIGHT NOW. Come home, write his girlfriend a no-contact letter to your satisfaction, let you mail it, and be totally transparent with you.

Anything short of that, you need to acknowledge with "That's interesting. I miss you, too, but you know what you need to do. This is your mess -- you get to clean it up."

Puppy