Papers signed...so what?

[JenInVen]

CW, TD, Lola, kml...thanks for the posts.

It is very obvious that he's almost spelling it out for me. Like a map that I need to foloow. It's becoming more and more clear to me that I need to get over the sadness and moodiness that I carry. I don't want H to feel sorry for me and think I'm not handling this maturely. I need to be the woamn who he wants to come home to. That means no crying, arguing or nagging.

Today he picked up D and I asked him to bring the cameras back to the apartment because I haven't seen the pics of the trip he and D took to Florida. He said he wants to put some of the pics on his iPod. Then he suggested that when he drops off D today he'll stick around and do that here. So thats a plus. And I get to be upbeat while he's here.

I sent him a TM last night that said "thanks for today" I didn't get a response until after he picked up D for the day. He said "No need to thank me for yesterday. Never think I don't like spending time with you all". So I wrote back with "I just wanted you to know that I appreciate you". I think I might have scared him off He didn't respond.

Thanks again for your words of wisdom!

Jen

[One Day]

Hey Jen!

That was some conversation with H. It sounds to me as though there's a lot of love there, but I agree with Ellie- he needs to see you happy and upbeat, getting on with things and being a beacon to attract him back to you!

I hope you're having a brilliant day today!!

L.xx

[JenInVen]

Thanks Lisa! I was reading what happened with your H on your thread. What is it about these men?

I'm realizing more and more every day that the sucess stories here are usually by people who have been happy and upbeat even when they might not have wanted to be.

Jen

[One Day]

I have no idea Jen- confused obviously to be walking away from hot gals like ourselves!

I totally agree about the successful DBers. Hopefully one day we'll be counted in with them too- I have my fingers crossed, but think you have a FAB chance from the conversation you had with H the other day!

(((((Jen)))))

[JenInVen]

Lisa
I guess at least we know they feel a lot for us. Tears can speak volumes.

Here is the chorus from Bob Marley's No, Woman No Cry. It was just on the radio and it's like he was singing to me LOL.

No, woman, no cry;
No, woman, no cry.
Woman, little darlin', say don't shed no tears;
No, woman, no cry.

Eh! Little darlin', don't shed no tears!
No, woman, no cry.
Little sister, don't shed no tears!
No, woman, no cry.)

[JenInVen]

Addie! I didn't see your post sorry! I agree with you. I do need to GAL and I'm planning to be very upbeat when he comes by this afternoon.

I think the trip to Canada (countdown on) will do our R good too. He's going to get a shock when we're not around for 10 days. During the trip I'm not planning on calling him. He can call all he wants after all he'll want to talk to D.

Jen

[JenInVen]

I just remembered something he said yesterday. He was talking about love and he said that he told a friend that he's not sure that love is enough to rebuild our M. I guess he needs to be shown that it is.

Jen

[TwinDad]

Jen,

Sounds like some pretty good conversation with your spouse. I think the trip coming up might be good for you. Make sure you do plenty with your daughter....have a great time. I recently took my kids on a trip and made sure I had a great time with them and told my W all about it when she would call. I noticed the contact on the first two days was just about the kids but a couple days later she was sending me text messages about her going in to get her hair done or that she was hungry waiting in line at the buffet (liek I neede to hear that...though I enjoyed the contact). I always made sure that she initiated it. My only regret is that the trip was only for 5 days and not the 10 that you are on. I actually asked her at the end pf trip if she missed "us" and she said yes and then I asked her how she enjoyed her time alone...and she said she didn't like it.

The sadest part of the trip was to not have the spouse there to experience the kids experiences...someone that shares the same love for them.

Best wishes on this trip...remember....be cool, have fun, and be pursued not the pursuer!

[JenInVen]

Thanks TD. I think the trip will be good for everyone. I'm regretting that I'll have to come back to Venezuela. My whole family is up in Canada and some of them I haven't seen in a very long time. I think 10 days won't be enough!

H was here this evening for about 3 hours. He and D put together a new lego set. I was in and out of the room. The topic of movies came up and then I got upset because he's been to a couple movies. What a twit I am. My head started spinning "events" and I got myself upset without H saying anything more than "I saw that movie". I gotta stop inventing scenarios in my head. So I pushed the topic of dating. He said he's been on a couple of dates but never with the same person twice, he's never kissed either of them nor has he had the desire too. Wow so I just keep diving head first into empty swimming pools! I can see the positive of him dating though...maybe he'll realize what he's leaving behind.

I'm going to play it cool for a few days. This will only work if I ditch the "poor me" attitude.

Jen

[JenInVen]

PS I leave on the 30/31 of this month. I have less than 2 weeks to show him what he'll be missing and then 10 days for him to miss it.

Jen