Torn between hope and anger

[lise]

I was catching up on your thread, SirPrizeMe, and I am sorry for the difficulty you are having with your child custody situation. Once you get into the legal system so many decisions are suddenly out of your hands. My lawyer sister who has been advising me says that basically the judge decides what is best for your kids and even though the courts are supposed to be neutral, they aren't. The mother almost always gets the children if she wants them. That's good for me, but not for you.

I still hope my H doesn't get nasty when it comes to ironing out our separation agreement (I still am not going to file for divorce and I greatly doubt he will do it himself.) Up until now, whenever I am at all resistant to what he considers his generous offerings to me, he starts throwing out threats about demanding custody of our sons. If I give the slightest peep about how hard it is to be a single parent or how he's not stepping up to his financial responsibilities, out come the threats. In his nicer moments he tells me how he is letting me have the boys because he knows how much I need them, like he's doing me a favor. Of course I want them with me, but the way he says that is so insulting.

When he is visiting next week I am sure I will have to run to this board to vent quite frequently just to survive it.