Wow!!!

A blast from the past.

In all honesty, it makes me sick to see how much of my life and my time was squandered on worrying about my crazy MLC'er and his BS antics.

Counting every single baby step and and trying to analyze every single thing he said or did.

Going without sleep and stressing myself out to the point of having to be on meds just to cope.

Thinking I "needed" him to exist.

Finding excuses to talk to him.....ahhh I am so ashamed!

I much prefer the person I am today, the person I had to become because of MLCBS.

Yes, I am happy my Husband returned home, we have made it to a year and things are pretty much normal now.

And as much as I love him, I don't always like him.
He did not make all of the changes I had to make.

In the few years of MLC I grew, and he remained stagnant.
Some of the things are character flaws, things he always had, nothing at all to do with MLC.

We forget so many things because we only seem to remember the "good" stuff and we see things through rose colored glasses.

We so desperately want our Spouses back, and want our Marriages restored that we almost set ourselves up for a huge dissapointment when they return.

There won't be a "Hollywood" apology, at least not in the begining.

Forgiveness is haaaard!!!!

It is a true test of patience and endurance to get though MLC.

There can be no testimony without a test.
I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.