affair

[sandi2]

Hi JC, I was asked to stop by and meet you. I'm Sandi and I almost walked away from my 41 year M. I too felt the emptiness that you speak of and like you I had an EA over the Internet with OM. However, he was not a long lost love b/c I had never met him before. I have never seen him in real life, just saw him over the web cam. I did IM, email, and had phone calls. Anyway, my H found out, and like your H, he started smothering me and after so many years of not having my emotional needs filled by my H....it just didn't work. So, I'm telling you all of this to let you know that I understand your feelings.

Now that I have your attention (I hope), let me say that all posters don't say exactly what you need to hear when you get up your nerve to finally come on line to ask for help. With that in mind, please....please don't leave us. You will find help and strength here if you will stick it out. So many woman that are in the same situation as you, will come and post a couple of times and then quit. We can't help you if you don't stay with us, even though you've been moved around on the board, don't give up.

I want you to know that there are many of us women here on this board that have been in similar situations like yours, but it takes time for us to find each other. That was one reason I was asked to come find you. So, I hope that you will hang on and let us try to help you and encourage you.

I did not have a PA with my OM and it has taken a long, long time to get him out of my head. I blame myself for that b/c I was feeding the fantasy that I had about him. You said you were obsessed with your OM.....I certainly can understand that and especially when you don't have feelings for your H.

Did I understand you correctly in your post about your H? Did you mean to say that you had not had sex in 20 years? Then after he discovered the A with OM, now you are having sex? Could you clear this up for me if this is not correct? I thought I held the record for going the longest without sex, but if you went 20 years.....you are indeed the record breaker.

I will go back and read your story from the beginning. Then I will know more about your stitch.

Don't give up and give us time to help. Stay on the DB board, okay? The weekends are a little slower b/c many are involved with weekend plans, but get back into things during the week. I will keep watch to see if you reply.

Sandi