JC, I saw your post on another thread. I thought it would be helpful to post it here:
Originally Posted By: jcneedshelp
been married for 26 yrs. in a sex and emotionally starved relationship. stayed for kids busy with work, let life go. ive been miserable for ever!! contacted old flame my first and only true love, we had an explicit on line affair, eventually got to gether had sex i got emotionally attached all over again. asked my husband to leave would have rather been alone, or other mans mistress as he said in same situation, but would not leave his wife. my husband found out, it was not pretty. now my husband is like casanova, willing to do anything to fix our marrage!!! im so confused. broke off in not a great way with affair, still long for him although i suppose would never work out. want to try fix marrage, alot of my life invested. right now although sex is back after 20 yrs. i dont feel love or sexual attraction for him!!! what do i do. one minute im ok next a wreck. this has been going on since january!!!
You will lots of support here. There are other's on this board that have been in an A, but found their way back. You may want to seek out Sandi who is in Newcomers and Piecing a lot.
What do you want? It sounds like you want to work on your M? If so, don't despair if the feelings aren't there. If your M has been so void of feelings/emotions/connections for so long, it will take awhile, and some serious work, to rebuild. BUT YOU CAN DO IT!
If you want to do counseling, make sure you find a pro-M counselor.
The first thing you need to do is to let go of the OM. You can't have 3 people in an R. You're going to need all your energy to work on your M, you won't have any to spare on OM.
Please seek out Sandi. I just posted to her thread on Piecing so I'll send her your way.
