I was just catching up with you when I read the comment about your wife punishing you via your D. It sounded just right to me. And also, like it was mentioned, at some point she will have to realise that D is yours as much as she is hers. She can not dictate to you what to do with YOUR D. I understand that you are staying low for reasons that you know best (Legal& DBing), but I think you have every right to get fed up with it and maybe talk to your L about it, see what he says.
