Like you, as long as OM is in the picture, there is no chance for R, at least that is what we have been told. I have been trying to figure out a way for OM to get out of the picture...
I guess I can't agree 100% with this right now. It seems that my R is being restored even though OM is still in the picture, as far as I know.
But R and M are not the same thing. Restoring the R may or may not lead to restoration of the M, but I do feel better. She has told me in the past that she didn't want to give me the wrong idea. To me, she does.
When R is not being discussed, then we have a loving, caring relationship. She just aint "there". That is not where you are. You have work to do. Alot. You are still in the "thrashing in the water" stage. I have been there. Took a long time to get where I am. And that was just recently, I feel. I had to make a conscious decision to keep trying, even with OM in picture. Not letting him get to me.
I have had my backslides as you know, but for the most part, I feel at peace. I do want my marriage to work. I want my wife. I want us to be happy again.
In my detaching, little as it is, I feel like Hope4us. Feeling like if I don't start hearing positive things, I may be the WAS.
Puppies question about whether I can love this woman that she is now, has got me doing my own "stinkin thinkin".
Still feeling good, though. For such a good past week, not sure why I am thinking about this stuff so much. I guess it is the stuff concerning "B" and now "Y". Like if I love my wife so much, why am I thinking about these other women.
Last edited by hopeful4her; 05/16/0807:25 PM.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
