SF, I am glad you are able to still pray for your H after all he has put your family through. Have you asked him if there is anything more you can do to help him? This may give you the key to helping move your sitch along rather than it remaining the same. So I guess what I am thinking of here is: Assuming for one moment that your H does want his family back together (it has to be an assumption until he carries out the actions to make it happen) what would he need you to do in order to help him achieve that aim? He knows what you need to happen b/c you have told him but unless I have missed it somewhere it doesn't appear that he has told you what he needs to happen.
I hope I make sense.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15