I have not told her I am not okay with her seeing others. Mainly because I know she is nowhere near happiness with me. She feels liberated. I will stop being so nice & accomodating for her. I think if I told her I have changed my mind on her seeing others she would basically say FU and do it anyway.
I don't know; she may say FU which in my opinion she is kind of doing everyday with her actions, so would that make that much of a difference? And then she can't justify her behaviors by saying you are OK with them, esp. if you are not ok with them. She also might agree not to see others, or maybe it would be something that she would do in time. But at least you are making clear your boundaries and I think that is something that she will have more respect for you (even if she doesn't like it). And you may have more self-respect too. (I didn't feel good about myself anyway when I was being a doormat.) Just my 2 cents anyway and you know what that's worth!!! Karen
Karen