Lack of sleep and tremendous stress is making me looney!
Today I'm feeling like what happened over the past 2+ years with H is no big deal, like I'm really moving on. Maybe being in my new place and getting ready for the move has had an effect on me. It's the first time I'm moving in to a place on my own without H. After 12 years of living together, it's strange but I can't say that I feel all that sad about it.
Upside: I've tried yoga, but I prefer pilates. I should explore meditation though. Wonder if it would help. I think I've decided to pack up H's things and bring them with me, unless he asks for them. Store them until I'm ready to get rid of them. Take it a step at a time.
peace: Thanks for sharing what works for you. I've been trying to realistically imagine how things would be if H were to come home. When I think of that, I realize we're BOTH far from ready - standing becomes more bearable and patience is much easier to have. It also makes me wonder if I really do want that stranger back. Aside from the benefits to the kids (although there is not much of a better reason than that to me), are there any qualities in H that I still admire? Does he help make me a better person? Right now, the answers are no and no.
