Mary - when you have some time, take a look at this thread: SallyM's story
Her H just ended his A after 18 months or so (and almost a year of separation). And, he wants to come home. She's grown so much, she realizes that he needs to do a lot of work and healing before that can happen.
If you have a chance, I STRONGLY recommend going back through her whole journey. It's a very inspiring story. I think it'll also help you see what we're all saying "in action."
At minimum take a look at some of her early threads and some of her neweest ones. Let me know if you have trouble finding them and I'll track them down for you.
I hadn't read up on her in awhile but used to post to SallyM a lot in the beginning. I just read her latest thread and I swear, she is a whole different (FAR stronger and healthier) person. It's not the first story on here like that and I'm sure won't be the last... but it's one sitch that put a big huge grin on my face today, and also one I think might be VERY helpful for you to read.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread