1.) arts/crafts w/D...ONCE/TWICE PER WEEK 2.) biking and walking outside with D...3 TIMES PER WEEK 3.) out with another mom and D on Fridays along with my D...EVERY FRIDAY 4.) reading other than self-help...EVERY NIGHT5.) a little gardening...3 TIMES PER WEEK6.) movies about once a month...ONCE PER MONTH 7.) that's about all I can think of at the moment.
Dar, as usual your response to me was mind boggling, but I didn't expect anything less.
I am so terribly sorry that the mentioning of my breast augmentation and discussions of Brazilian waxing offended you, to the point that you had to equate it with your postings on outrageous things.
Just so you know, for many years during my Marriage my Husband had asked me to try getting a BW and I flatly refused.
One of the changes I made about myself was to actually try to have an open mind to some of the things he suggested during the Marriage.
Perhaps if I had listened to the many things he had asked of me over the years alot of the bad things that happened could have been avoided.
How many things did your Husband ask you to change about yourself or to try that you refused to do?
As for the Breast Augmentation, I had that done for myself, as I had nursed all 8 of my children and was very self conscious as to the condition of my body.
It was one of the best things I have ever done for myself and for my Husband, and I recommend it to everyone.
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And to throw H in the mix. Our marriage had many sh*tty things happen in it, starting with our babies dying 9 days after getting married. H AND MYSELF have both dealt with alot in our marriage and the black cloud that seems to follow.
And what does that have to do with anything? The black cloud of doom that you are talking about is created by you. So you had bad things happen to you, all the more you should show grace and love and kindness to others.
You seem to want this one upmanship.....
You have mentioned that you have been separated longer then anyone else here on this forum. Check the dates of the other posters here.
You have mentioned that your babies died, although tragic, many here have had the same misfortune, including myself. I also have lost 4 babies and that also affected my Marriage.
I am so done with trying to figure you out, and to try and understand you and to sympathize with you.
I don't have any bad feelings towards you Dar, I am just so tired of the saying the same thing over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.
And nothing ever changes......
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
I'm sorry you took my reply as such BND. I was trying to compare other body part threads I've read in comparison with mine and that's why I brought up the breast aug & BW. Like Amy said, she even talks about her toys too. So I didn't think it was such a big deal. No biggie, but my apologies for offending.
Dar, honestly I was a little miffed with you saying you had uterine cancer when you didn't. Whether or not this was the intended effect, it brought me out of my "don't beat you head against a wall with Dar" mode into supporting you. My grandmother died of uterine cancer and I mentioned my sister before. It tugged on my heart strings. Then when I realized you didn't actually "have uterine cancer" I felt duped.
Me: 42/H: 37 T: 10 years/M: 8 D9, S8 Bomb: 7.23.07 Separated: 1.20.08 D Final 3.19.09 Affair started in '05, found out parts in 11/07. They married 11.26.09
CW, I'm very sorry. I didn't know that's what I didn't have at first. I panicked and put it out here. It's all endometriosis. I didn't lie about it at all though, it's what I thought I had. I still have endo that needs to be checked and cancerous cells but I guess that's it.
I'm a great person and fun to be around. I'm enjoying my life more and more each day. I do more, play more, have more fun in general.
As far a H goes, he's a part of it when/if he wants to be. If he decides to call or email, great. If not, great. It's no longer a big deal to me.
Friends, I found out yesterday that I have uterine cancer. I'm not even all that concerned about it because I know it will be taken care of by Him. I'm sharing this with you so you can see for yourselves my real attitude and it just wasn't showing here.
Thanks for reading!
Edited by darboyd5 (04/22/08 11:17 AM) _________________________
READ YOUR OWN WORDS.........
BELIEVE IN THEM......
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
Thanks for this reminder BND. I was just outside for break saying this to myself as well....I said it to me at lunch too. Just have to keep telling myself so I keep knowing it.
Hi all, just kinda veggin' here while working. I was just thinking while bringing a file across the building. I use the term "you win" when I talk to H and say he can have his divorce. But that's not really accurate because I wouldn't be losing at all. I live in a nice area with our D and have lots of family and friends that love me. I pay all my bills on time and sometimes have enough over to treat D and myself to things....and that's with less child support than I would legally be getting. So I've made it and will continue to make it regardless of H returning or not. He on the other hand will have the bachelor life he wants so badly, but will only be able to see his child twice a week still. For someone that loves their child as much as H does, that's really a sucky deal. Is that what he wants? Would he happy with that? I'm not saying this is what's going to happen at all. I'm saying that I will not be a loser in the deal at all and hadn't really thought of it that way before.
