Will it make it easier on you

[klm]

I think I react to him too much. Sometimes I feel like he's unsure how things will go, he's more standoffish, or just less talkative. And I let it put me off. I follow his lead and am not as touchy I think. I think I have to work on acting as if things are fine when we get together, on not letting my doubts creep in - it could be nothing more than he's had a long day, but it makes me timid and I wonder if what I say/do will be the "right" thing. I am not sure where we stand, and it shows.

Yep, me too. That is exactly what I do. His mood is affecting yours...which means he is in control of the mood when you two are together.

Last night and this morning were very nice. Those moments are what remind me of why I'm fighting so hard.

We need those. They are few and far between, but it really does reenergize our will to fight.

[Kalni]

Michelle,

this is the official warning that if you keep doing what you did last night another 12.983.364 times, you WILL be kicked out of the LBA!

I realised my Hs mood MOST of the times has NOTHING to do with me. Very often I convince myself it doesn't. It helps a lot. He would have driven me ...crazier if I thought his moods are about me.

Take care Hottie!
K

[jon2911]

Last night and this morning were very nice. Those moments are what remind me of why I'm fighting so hard.

So glad that you're finally seeing some encouraging signs in your sitch.

[MichelleLT]

Lisa, somehow I suspect there will be more lonely moments, so I'm not turning in my card yet!

Kalni, I will start keeping track! Lol

I suspect I need to just act like we're dating and accept his actions instead of the confusion in his words. Meaning, I can't be afraid to contact H (although calling every day is definitely out lol) and I definitely need to invite him over for dinner and hanging out in the hot tub. We need to have some fun moments and things are always easier in person.

Plus after the way he's acted this last year, he owes me a LOT of make-up sex!

[GoingForward]

I suspect I need to just act like we're dating and accept his actions instead of the confusion in his words. Meaning, I can't be afraid to contact H (although calling every day is definitely out lol) and I definitely need to invite him over for dinner and hanging out in the hot tub. We need to have some fun moments and things are always easier in person.

Sounds like a good plan. I especially like the hot tub bit.

Plus after the way he's acted this last year, he owes me a LOT of make-up sex!

LOL!! I guess that means I have 3 years worth coming to me!!!

Damn......I miss make-up sex.

[MichelleLT]

I don't even care who is supposedly doing the making up, I'd just like to ML a lot lol.

I figure it might be time to let down some of my barriers. I.e. letting him know where I live, having him over, also having him share some of the travel burden. And he seemed open to that last night.

So, I didn't really look in the mirror all day. I just discovered I have a hickey again. I literally have (not very visible luckily) teeth marks over my collar bone lol.


I took the Irritable Male Syndrome quiz on behalf of H. He scored very high in escape, uncompassionate, impulsive, and exhausted.

Type 5: Uncompassionate
Men who fall into this category have a difficult time empathizing with others. We are often quite independent and self-sufficient and we have trouble with people who are emotional. Those close to us say we don’t communicate or share our feelings. We often have suffered emotional wounds and don’t want to risk getting hurt again.

Type 6: Exhausted
Men who fall into this category are tired a good deal of the time. We often feel stressed at home and at work. Life can seem overwhelming at times and we think of getting away from it all. Our energy level is low and it seems we are often running on empty. We may have difficulty sleeping. We often feel we haven’t lived up to our potential.

Type 7: Impulsive
Men who fall into this category are unpredictable. We can be impulsive and excitable. When we are feeling at our best we can be lively, fun, and outrageous in a positive way. When we are down we can become defensive and argumentative. Things can be going along well and all of a sudden something sets us off and we blow up.

Type 8: Escape
Men who fall into this category cover their feelings with alcohol and other drugs, food, T.V., and computers. We use nicotine to give us a boost as well as to relax. We may smoke marijuana. Alcohol is often a significant presence in our lives. We often over-eat and spend hours lost in front of the T.V. or the computer. We want to zone out.

The quiz is available at: http://www.theirritablemale.com/quiz.htm

I find it interesting that almost all the symptoms overlap with male depression. But I'm not a psychologist.

[GoingForward]

I don't even care who is supposedly doing the making up, I'd just like to ML a lot lol.

I'm right there with ya! Well not literally, but you know what I mean! LOL

I figure it might be time to let down some of my barriers. I.e. letting him know where I live, having him over, also having him share some of the travel burden. And he seemed open to that last night.

That's good. Sounds like it's definitely time to start making him feel more included in knowing where you live, etc, etc. And I think if he does make the trip(s) to see you, that will show terrific effort on his part.

So, I didn't really look in the mirror all day. I just discovered I have a hickey again. I literally have (not very visible luckily) teeth marks over my collar bone lol.

Ouch! Hope it was the good kind of hurt, iykwim!

[Virtually_Handsome]

Three years, four months, ten days! CUT IT OUT!

[MichelleLT]

I certainly wasn't complaining at the time!

(((Jeff))) You can live vicariously through us on the BB.

[MichelleLT]

So, my friend just sent me this link. This is so damn funny!
Cat Bus