Trying Hard to Detach

[addie]

Hi Eagle,
I didn't realize you had moved into Separated forum.

I'm so sorry things aren't going well for you right now. Your W seems very angry eventhough she's the one that has filed for D. You have to do what you need to do to protect yourself and the kids in the legal process. W has to deal with her own feelings of anger. Try not to let her drag you down as well. You seem to be remaining calm and that's perfect. She may be angry because you are not reacting the way she thought you would. If you were being nasty she would feel justified in seeking D but since you are being nice she is having to deal with all her guilt and confusion and it's coming out as anger.

You are right - most of the WAS do not take responsibility for their own happiness but instead blame everything on the LBS. This is so very common. Try to continue detaching but aboveall, don't react - you don't want to get caught up in all her anger.
Have you read some of the posts on Surviving the Big D forum or Divorced but not Done. These 2 forums may provide further insight for you.