CBK, I am thirsty! Any day but Thursday is good for me.
H4H, confused is right word, for me at least, W I don't know.
She is upset with me because I don't give her time to spend with OM - she said she needs time to know him better, but when I say I don't want him around the kids because I don't know who this guy is, she says to relax that she knows the guy very well.... she has been knowing him for years.... when I imply that she has been having this relation for sometime, and it actually started before she asked me to divorce, she says that she just met the guy. So, she lies, here is the confusion.... but I cannot follow it anymore, neither discuss it. I have nightmares about W telling me she has been cheating for years, that she was in love with somebody else for all the time we have been together..... last night the nightmare was that she was telling me the real father of my son was actually a soldier who died in Iraq.... she was crying for his death. Sometime W is nice with me, she talks with a sweet voice and I am ready to melt, but I know the sweetness is because she is ready to ask me a favor of some sort.... My family hate her, they see me suffering and they suffer too, I don't know how that can ever been patched. Friday night I went out by myself, in a disco club of some sort, I have been by myself most of the night, and that was sad, then a young lady came close to me and started dancing all sexy, she started touching and she had more hands then an octopus, I have to say I did enjoy the moment, but I didn't follow up. At the end of the night I was even more sad and more lonely. I cannot see a good solution and this tears me apart. Even if she changes her mind, the damage to our relation is so big that I have no idea if it can ever been patched.
