Ok, I have been questioning for awhile whether or not H is in a MLC. He is only 36 but his actions are rather odd. Concerns about going out more, starting sentances with I am 36 years old and... even the continuance of contact with OW is through texts and it is when myself or his friends aren't bothering to text back, like some highschool kid.
But I read the MLC page and there was no wierd things with his appearance. This morning he texted me to tell me he dyed his hair. Now he has a receeding hair line but no grey. When I asked what colour he said frosted orange tips!!
Last edited by Snow White; 05/11/0811:55 AM.
Me~34 H~38 D6.5
EA/PA-DEC.07
Moved out~Apr.13,08 Sep. Papers~Dec.7,08 No contact order ~Dec.9,08 and again October 13, 2009
My H is 37 and I am not sure if he is going through a MLC or not either. He is going through some type of crisis, that is for sure. He has sudden wanted to go back to his life before he met me. He has lost 50 pounds, dyed his hair purple (now it is blonde highlighted tips), got contacts, goes to tanned booths, works out ALL of the time... He says that he is NOT getting older, but is getting younger. He said that he liked being with the OW because she made him feel young. He is staying out all night, going to bars, etc. All of this is stuff that he did in his mid 20's right before we met.
I don't know what is going on with him. Actually labeling it a MLC or not doesn't really matter to me. As long as I just keep in mind that he is "sick" right now it doesn't really matter what you call it.
Strange though how so many guys seem to go through this bizarre behavior in their late 30's!!!
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
It certainly seems like your H is going through a second childhood (because he acts like such a spoiled baby-sorry!). Is second childhood part of the MLC syndrome?
Anyway, just stopped by to wish you a very happy Mother's Day. You're a great mom and I hope you have a very enjoyable day.
Love your new name. I think it's perfect.
M: 37 H: 36 Married: Aug 13, 2004 Decision to Divorce: July 20, 2008 Reconciled: September 2008 Current: Ambivalence
It certainly seems like your H is going through a second childhood (because he acts like such a spoiled baby-sorry!). Is second childhood part of the MLC syndrome?
Anyway, just stopped by to wish you a very happy Mother's Day. You're a great mom and I hope you have a very enjoyable day.
Love your new name. I think it's perfect.
Thanks GPI! Don't be sorry I couldn't agree more.
I had a decent day, good by current standards with H.
As mentioned earlier he started early again texting. Today is "his day to sleep in" the only day that he doesn't work or take care of D while I work. When he was at home he would sleep if I let him till 10 sometimes later. This morning just like Friday morning he was up texting by 7.
He was here with coffee by 8. This surprised me because he had started last night with the fact that he wasn't sure he wanted to go to my sister's for breakfast.
I had texted at the time that if he was serious about wanting to stay together that he would have to see my family eventually. When I mentioned this to my sister she said oh I didn;t realize he was thinking about coming. That will be akward(thanks for the support!)
I think he is embarassed of his stupid hair, he didn;t want to take his hat off, then said it looks better wet, then after his shower said look no one will even notice.
My sister called about 8:30 to say she had just rec'd a call from my mom, my dad had gone into the hospital last night with heart problems and was still there(his heart was racing his BP was 205/180.) He is overweight, and diabetic. My mom was calling to cancel breakfast but he was having blood tests at 10 and my dad was hungry and wanted to eat so maybe we could put it off until 11 - 11:30.
Normally (even before our problems) this is the sort of inconvenience that H would complain about, ruining his day by pushing back breakfast when we were supposed to go golfing(not the dad part). He didn't say a word. He did laugh at my dad, typical having a heart attack and worried about his next meal.
H gave me my gift and a card, Card was not mushy but an interesting choice
Happy Mother's Day to My Wife From the guy who got you into this whole mess in the first place
I'm glad he acknowledges it!!
He bought me 2 new golf shirts - girly ones - and a new black hat with pink writing and golf towel. I absolutely loved my gift. I had just mentioned when he was here the other night how none of my shirts fit(as I was trying to find something for the movies).
We went to breakfast and it really wasn't that akward, at least I didn't think so, of course most of the conversation was around my dad. It meant the world to me that he went, I did not invite him, I did not tell him that I would be disappointed if he didn't come when he said he might not.
After breakfast we went over to his parents but they weren't home so off we went golfing. It was decent for the first 9 holes. There has always been tension when we go out, H is an excellent golfer he was actually offered a scholarship to Penn state to play. I am not so good, I could be better than average, but I do not get to play enough and it takes me a bit to hit my groove.
D was less than cooperative by the time we got to the back 9, so it wasn't all that plesant. After golf we went over to his parents to visit his mom and left after D started a tantrum about her ring she thought she left in the golf cart.
H made the following statement to me(not D) "this is what I am not missing. " Well no kidding. Does he think I enjoy it?
I was actually beginning to wonder myself if this was part of the issue. My daughter is like the "little girl who had a little curl" You know that poem? When she is good she is very, very good, and when she is bad she is horrid. She is 4 and has yet to grow out of the terrible twos, she reminds me sometimes of the kids on Super Nanny. That being said, she is better when it is just her and I, well not actually, but I just put her in her room and she can scream all she wants and get no attention for it. H can't handle that.
The day he left - she started a tantrum and he got angry and yelled at her that if she didn't stop he would beat her. (never touched her). Then he went in to take a bath and when I went in there he was crying. I told him I know that we have a lot going on but he cannot talk to her like that. He said "Do you think I wanted to say that?". That was the last day he lived at home. H was beaten as a child. I am realizing now that everytime H went out and even now when he comes over he leaves at the same time - bedtime - in my everything is about the OW mindset(who I have no confirmed contact with since Dec) I used to think oh he must leave because he is going to see her and she has a child and it is after the child goes to bed. Now I am wondering if it is to avoid the 2 hours of crying, and begging and nonsense that goes on every night when OUR daughter is supposed to be going to bed. Now he goes and sits at his friends house and watches hockey while I deal with it.
Oh if you actually took the time to read this far my daughter bought me a hoola hoop, because "Mommy didn;t have one!"
That and some bright, bright red lipstick. I did wear it in highshcool back when that llok was in(remember the Simply Irresistable Video) but when I tried it on today it was like look out here comes Denise's lips.
Me~34 H~38 D6.5
EA/PA-DEC.07
Moved out~Apr.13,08 Sep. Papers~Dec.7,08 No contact order ~Dec.9,08 and again October 13, 2009
Oh if you actually took the time to read this far my daughter bought me a hoola hoop, because "Mommy didn;t have one!"
That and some bright, bright red lipstick. I did wear it in highshcool back when that llok was in(remember the Simply Irresistable Video) but when I tried it on today it was like look out here comes Denise's lips.
LOL!!! That's funny!
And I love how D got her mommy a hoola hoop! How precious!
PS - Diggin' the name change, too.
Happy Mother's Day!
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
Not too much happened yesterday. I had mentioned to H on Sunday that they were building an Aarons close by and they were advertising that they were hiring. He asked me to send in his resume. Aarons is very similar to his store but the better souped up american version. That he asked me to send in his resume is major in that he is terrified of interviews has very little confidence in himself to do well. He knows how important it is he no longer works where he is.
He just called me to say that they called to say they got his resume and the store is still in construction but they will be inviting him for an interview in the next 3 to 4 weeks.
He is nervous because when Aarons came in to Toronto, they recruited from his stores then got rid of a lot of people following the grand opening.
I said just be honest with them and ask them about that, tell them that you have a wife and child(that you abandoned) and need to know that is not the intent.
If he could go there I think it would be very positive for him, he is very very disatisfied with his work and I think that is a factor in our problems, on top of OW being an employee there.
Me~34 H~38 D6.5
EA/PA-DEC.07
Moved out~Apr.13,08 Sep. Papers~Dec.7,08 No contact order ~Dec.9,08 and again October 13, 2009
[quote=Snow WhiteThat and some bright, bright red lipstick. I did wear it in highshcool back when that llok was in(remember the Simply Irresistable Video) but when I tried it on today it was like look out here comes Denise's lips. [/quote]
Oh if you actually took the time to read this far my daughter bought me a hoola hoop, because "Mommy didn;t have one!" 
