Husband insists its over-what now? Please help!

[AliSuddenly]

Hi Lea.. I agree with Saffie.. I guess you cant check your thread though as H is there !!!! I hope its going ok, if you do get to check here though....resist all urges to bring up the R, or hug him, or cry or ANYTHING! If he hugs you, then accept the hug, but just dont initiate anything. I had to do this the day my BF came round in January to collect all his stuff. I was dying inside and it was very hard, so whenever I thought I would burst into tears, I moved to another room... I helped him pack though, was nice, friendly, made him lunch.. treated him like a flat mate moving out, you'd help them right? I wasnt in a great place so wasnt super chatty or happy, clearly, I was quiet, but I kept my feelings to myself and let him be responsible for waht he was doing, I didnt pour emotion on him. My sister (who went through this and DBed and got her H back) says, that if you dont show emotion, they cant just pin their emotions on you, so if you are weak and tearful and vunerable, they can take the opposite position and push you away and , well, I'm not explaining this very well, but if you act AS IF and do not put your emotions on to them, then they have nothing to do but notice their own and they cant blame you for it. They have to sit with their own emotions.

I hope its going ok, thinking of you,

Ali xxx
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Me: 37 BF: 34 T: 9 years
IDLYA: 2 Nov 07
Own flat: 26 Jan 08
Depression confirmed: 4 Mar
Stuck in Stage 2 !