Cake eating or progress?

[Trixi]

I deactivated my profile, so no, I guess I don't want him to know (at least not like that). I think that I was especially keen on the idea that he would be all excited to see who viewed is profile and then to read that the name was "kissmyarseJ" and a picture of me (or us) might have made his stomach drop.

It would be more mature of me to ask what is up; I am not feeling terribly mature right now.

You ask if it is a deal breaker for him to be on there or only if he tries to meet someone...Isn't that *why* he is on? to meet someone? Yeah, I think it's a deal breaker, in the sense that I won't be seeing him anymore. I still hope to salvage the marriage, but it isn't going to happen if he is dating (or attempting to date) other people.

If I met a guy off match, we were sleeping together, we just went away on an exotic vacation where ILYs were exchanged, and then I found him poking around on match, I would be done with him. Is that unreasonable? Am I throwing the baby out with the bath water?

I don't even know what to say "Gee, honey, we had a great time in CR and so I decided to see if you are active on match, and you are- what's up?"? "Hey- are you looking to date other women?"? I suppose I could turn a blind eye, but that doesn't seem wise either.

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!